This is an excerpt from Darci’s Focus on the 90% book.
I over heard two women talking in line at the grocery store and one woman asked the other if she had made any News Years Resolutions? She replied “Oh why bother, I have so many things I want to improve and I never stick to them anyway.”
Could I relate to that! I found in the past that I did not stick to my resolutions either. Just like the woman in line at the grocery store, I felt there were just too many things, too many “10%s” I wanted to improve. At the start of a year I would buy a lovely flowered journal and “lay out” what I wanted to resolve to do better in the upcoming year. I wanted to be healthier, build a stronger marriage with Darren, more quality time with Jayda and John, more time with family and friends, internal healing work, etc, etc…
So here is what I did a few years ago. I decided I would only work on one thing a year. I would spend the entire year working on just that one thing. People ask me, “Where do I start?” Sit by yourself for a few minutes and think about your biggest stress — your burning issue — your greatest “10%”. What is it? Your self-esteem? Health? Money? A relationship that needs mending? Something from your past? (you might be saying – all of the above!). I have often asked people when they stopped loving themselves and many can tell me exactly when. I would start there.
Pick just one 10% and “lay that sucker out”. With the full lives we lead, how can we possibly fit in ten improvements?
Spend this year working on that one thing. Don’t try and deal with the weight, the smoking, the ex, and the aging parents all in one year. That is why we do not stick to improving our 10%s, there are too many to think about. I respect that other “issues” of life are still around, but your main focus should be that one thing. Spend that year doing what you need to do to make it happen — gyms, books, websites, counseling, naturopaths, healers, etc.
I create pockets of time (i.e. turn the TV off!) and make the commitment. I post my resolution everywhere; it becomes my theme for that year. I tell everyone what I am working on so they can keep me accountable. Most importantly, I promise myself, at the end of the year, this one thing will have greatly improved. I will not talk about improving the same thing over and over. I will just do it. It will change your life to improve this way. I know it is hard. But what are we waiting for? The hardest person to change is the one that stares back at you in the mirror.
So now, the next time someone in a grocery store line asks you if you have made any New Year’s Resolutions you can say. “Yes, I made ONE and I am really going to stick to it.”