March Booster: Be an Army of Support. Show Up For Other Women.

Happy March! Happy International Women’s Day!

My theme this year is “Show up,” and my theme for March is “Show up for other women.” I have to tell you there have been a few 10%s in my life right now, and yesterday was a super rough day. It was like everything just added up to be a lot. Before I crashed, which I didn’t have the option of doing, I knew what I had to do to protect and preserve myself. So, I slept in a bit and eased into the day slowly. Though I was blessed with a huge work day, I took a good look at what I had to do, not what I wanted to do; I just took it easy because I knew I needed some recovery time.

Then I ordered myself a beautiful, healthy lunch, and I sat and ate slowly at my sunny kitchen table. I went back to work, and I looked again at what I had to do. I was honest with my clients, and I said, “I’m sorry everything I told you I’d get you today I’m going to have to get you tomorrow,” and every single one of them said that was okay. I worked as much as I had to and then I took my dog Holly for a long sunny walk. When I got home, I put a podcast on, and in the sun, I made a beautiful, healthy supper. When Darren got home, we went for another long walk so we could talk and I could process how I was feeling. I texted and called my army of support, my girlfriends whom I love so much, to vent and process even further. I felt so loved and supported that day. I had a peaceful quiet evening and went to bed super early. Emotional stuff is exhausting.

As I lay in bed, I thought of the millions of women who just had the day I had. The millions of women who woke up and had a really rough day, who do not have the flexibility at work to move their schedules around. Women who do not have a sunny table to eat at, money for healthy food, or a spouse or partner to share all that with. I thought of and prayed for, the women who do not have an army of supportive friends

So, for March, let’s support other women. Reach out to them and support them in any way you can. Love other women because everyone has bad days.

What can you do to support and show up for other women?

February Booster: Feb-YOU-ary Show Up for Yourself

This month, it’s all about YOU – taking care of and loving you. In order to show up and love others fully, you must have energy, feel good and love yourself first. So, how do we do that? Well, let me share what has worked for me.

For me, it’s a combination of mental and physical go-tos. On the mental side, it’s training my sweet little brain on how to be positive and think good thoughts, and, of course, knowing that complaining only increases your negative energy. On the physical side, my four go-tos are sleep, exercise, nutrition and meditation. Sounds easy right! This month I will be running a video series highlighting how each one of these components has changed my life, helping me show up for myself and others.

Here is a sneak peek of what I share on the six videos.

The first video will teach you how to handle the negative thoughts that come into your brain by shepherding them away from your 90%s so they don’t hijack your day! The next video will teach you to talk more about what you are grateful for and remind you that complaining more than three times about something is your trigger to “lay that sucker out!”

Sleep is sanity. Learning how to identify what actions you are taking during the day that makes you tired and understanding how a night of great sleep is one way to show up for you this month. Exercise is a non-negotiable routine for me, as I believe you can’t be mentally well, unless you are physically well. It is also therapy for me, and I share ways how to find time to fit this in; trust me, you are worth it! Enhancing nutrition is key to me feeling my optimum self, and it is a journey! Balancing nutrition is a key component to loving yourself, and I share how doing this has helped me show up! Finally, quieting my brain through meditation helps me to slow down, unleash and capture my creativity and feel grounded. It’s been a real game-changer for me.

So, this month, take the time to invest in and focus on you. Just try it; you’ll be happy you did!

Show up for important you.

January Booster: Happy New Year

Happy New Year! An annual tradition that seems to consume most of us this time of year is the making of a New Year’s resolution.
If you’ve followed me for a long time, you know I don’t like to make a New Year’s resolution to start the year. I like to create a theme for the year and for years, I have been creating a new theme. Have you ever tried that instead?
For this last year, my theme was “Worthiness.” I had just written my fourth book, a woman’s book called Embrace the 90%. I talked a lot about trauma, and I just felt I needed something that was a little more healing. So I picked the theme worthiness, I bought myself a heart-shaped rose quartz ring, and I had that ring all year to remind me of my theme.
For 2023, my theme is “Show Up.” I have been speaking this year for 30 years, I have been with my husband Darren for 30 years, and my admin assistant Sandra has worked beside me for 30 years. You know what? I have shown up for my life. Like last year, I bought myself a fun ring this year to remind me of how I have shown up, and need to continue to show up in 2023. Throughout the year, I’ll share how my “Show Up” theme is going, as well as those that have shown up for me in my life.
If New Year’s resolutions aren’t for you, join me in creating a theme in 2023, support it with a reminder piece, and honour the thing you need to work on the most this year. You will be happy you did! Again, happy new year, and I look forward to hearing all about your themes for 2023.
Happy New Year!

December Booster: Life is Short

Use the Good China!

Years ago, I was out walking my dog, and there was a garage sale in my neighbourhood. I stopped because everything they had seemed new and in packages.
There were beautiful crystal glasses still in their box, china dishes that had never been used and satin pyjamas still in the package. As I touched those beautiful things, I asked the person hosting the sale why everything was still in the original packaging. He replied, “My mom just passed away, and these are all her beautiful things. She never used the good things; they stayed on the shelf and in the drawer.”
I walked away, and it made me feel so sad. That beautiful soul did not want to use the good things in her life. Why not? And now it is all being sold at a garage sale. My grandma had shelves of dishes we had never used.
Why do we pull out the good things just on holidays? Why the heck don’t we use them every day? Use the good stuff. This Christmas season, haul out the glasses, use the dishes and sleep in the silk pyjamas. Then, when the Christmas season is over, leave it all out to use every day.
Life is way too short not to use the beautiful things we have.

Believe in You

Just because they say it… 
Does it mean it’s true? 
I was in high school and told the teacher how much I enjoyed his class. Without looking up from his desk, he said, “That’s nice, but you will not amount to much if this class is all you are good at.” I shrunk a little. When I started my three companies, I fought through this label. To add to it, people would constantly ask me if my business was something my dad gave me, or they would look past me, asking me if someone older could help them instead. I was told I was too young, too female and lacked education way too many times. I did not set out to be a motivational speaker. I was 24 years old when my bank manager Ed asked me to speak to his staff about my “Focus on the 90%” idea. Saying yes to Ed led to the career I have today. It was hard to believe in myself at first. I played small. Could I really do this? I overcompensated; I wanted to be like the speakers I saw on television.
After years of fighting through this label (and many others), I did amount to something. I became comfortable in my skin. I learned how to be a speaker, one who was authentically me. I owned that. I stopped playing small and unworthy. I won awards and was recognized by my peers. I wrote books. I have mentored many people and go out of my way to help people bust through the other side of their labels. I challenge others to see how their labels have held them back from getting what they want. Just because someone told you that you would not amount to anything, does it mean it is true?
Believing in you…

Living, Loving & Learning

It was 1993, and I was 24 years old, having what I now call my “quarter-life crisis.”  I was a physical, mental and emotional mess. I went to the library and took out every book I could on self-help. I sat on the floor of my run-down rental house, stopped drinking and partying, and I read one book at a time to help move me forward in a positive way.

I remember the Saturday night I stayed home to read Living, Loving, Learning by Leo Buscaglia.  I was sitting on my couch, and though I didn’t have any money, the money I was saving not drinking all the time, gave me a little extra money for a small pizza.  I remember that day. It was one of the many that set me on my path to wanting to be a better person, and the author Leo Buscaglia sounded like the kindest man in the world.

I saved that book, and last weekend I read that book again. It took me right back to being that brave young woman who wanted to change. I underlined this part of the book, and I remember reading it and thinking, I want to be that person. “You are all you have. Therefore, make yourself the most beautiful, tender, wonderful, fantastic person in the world. And then you will always survive.”  I wanted to survive. I wanted to take better care of myself and live a wonderful, fantastic life.

I finished the book, and on the last few pages, there was a stain where I dropped pizza on the book. I touched the page and smiled. My life is 100% different than I ever thought it would be. Since that day, I have made small choices to love the woman in the mirror.  To believe I was worthy. No one taught me how to do that. I learned how. Let’s spend this fall learning how together.

I am pulling the following quote from my latest book, Embrace the 90%, as I think it helps relay the message.

“Let’s stop passing a mirror and seeing what we don’t like, and instead look right into that mirror and say, “I love you” to the person who stares back at you.”

You are worth it.

Booster: From Darkness Comes Light

It has felt like a heavy September so far. There is sadness in our world, in our province and close to home, and it comes to us in many forms. It came to me recently by attending a child’s funeral, and I hope never to experience that level of sadness again.
We read, hear and deal with tragedies, but what if we reduced the time we spend learning more about them and focused that time on what we can do to help instead? We spend so much time focused outward.
We spend so much time and money on our appearances, homes and businesses but do we take the time to spend on our inner selves? Spend more time on what you can do to be a better human being. So, then you can help more human beings. We focus on the external world, but what about the internal one? When you are a full, rested, nourished person, you can fill others from that place.
Pay attention to what is taking your time and attention away from taking care of you. Then ask yourself, what could I do slightly better to feel better?
When you feel better, you act better. So, when I am kinder to myself, I have the love and energy to share kindness with others.
The world needs kindness. Your community needs kindness. Your team members need kindness. But, most importantly, the people you love that are hurting need you. Are you going to show up for them?

Darci’s Booster: Stay Grateful

As I walked into the hotel lobby for an event this week, it was full of people. There were people smiling, some were crying, and some had blank stares.

As I waited in the hallway for my client to arrive, I chatted with the hotel staff and asked them why the hotel was so busy. I learned that the hotel was full of people who had to flee their country with only the clothes on their back.

As the day wore on, I met some of those people in the hallway. I watched their sweet children running around the hotel and wondered what they thought. One man shared with me how sad he was to leave his family pictures behind. “No memories,” he said, “no memories.” What really got me was when a woman told me they had to leave behind their family pets. I hugged a few strangers and prayed Canada would be a fresh start for them.

I came home that day extra grateful. Grateful for my home, my family, our pictures (ok, a hard drive full of pictures) and my sweet pets.

I know we all have full lives with 10% mixed in. Times like this really reset me. My stresses are so small in comparison.

Happy Summer!

I like to kick off the summer with a re-read of Michael Singer’s book, The Untethered Soul. Michael asks the question, “If you had a week to live, what would you do with that week?” I think a lot about that as I walk my beloved dog Holly in the cemetery each evening. What would I do?
I know exactly what I would do. I would slow life right down and fill my days with only the things that I love and bring a smile to my face. I would wake up super early and thank God for the life I never thought I would have. I would spend all day in our beautiful backyard and kiss and love up my pets. I would tell my family what I always tell them, that I love them, and I am grateful that I got to be their wife and mom.
A big part of what I would do that week would be to invite everyone I love to my house, and one by one, I would tell them why I love them so much and what impact they have had on my life. Then we would party with beautifully catered meals — big, long, into-the-night celebrations. At the end of that week, I would open up my laptop one last time, and write a message to all of my clients and audience members to thank them for their support with a reminder to live their lives fully. I would write a letter of love and appreciation to everyone in my circle of support—the family and friends who have been so loving and supportive.
Then Michael also asks a second part to this question, “What can you do to incorporate some of those activities into every week of your life NOW?”
Great question. I will start by telling all of you how much I appreciate you and all you have done to support my career as my client, audience member and follower. Thank you.
What would you do?What can you do to incorporate more of that into your everyday?

Laugh

One of my favourite people was my great Aunt Fuss. Her name was Mary but because she was such a fussy baby, she earned the nickname Fuss. After her passing, my dad was given a box of her personal things. Recently, my dad found something special, a bible that had been given to her in 1924. What made it extra special is that Aunt Fuss had written in it, “To Darci from Fuss – 1976” and no one had ever seen that.
My dad brought me this bible, and it had a bookmark in the middle. I was so excited to get this and thought for sure that the bookmarked page would be a passage that would change my life. I thought Aunt Fuss must have earmarked those pages for me to learn something extraordinary. So I read the pages over and over, I researched the passages and nothing.
Then it hit me. The message was not in the pages but in the bookmark itself, “The most wasted day of all is that one in which you have not laughed.”
You are so right Aunt Fuss; it is a wasted day when we have not laughed and smiled.
The last two years have been challenging, and some of those 10%s could definitely cause our smiles to fade. Let’s make a choice today to laugh, smile and not waste another day!