When we hold that basket out and ask for money.

During our recent family holiday, we attended the local Catholic church for a Sunday service. When it was time for us to contribute money to the collection, this friendly man with a basket in one hand made his way up the aisle to take our envelope. I have seen this many times but something was extra special about him.

What was special was that every time someone from the congregation placed their envelope in the basket, Paul would take an extra second, look them right in the eye and he would say, “Thank you.”  He was so genuine and caring.

Collection Basket - Thank You

Collection Basket – Thank You

I reflected on how that the basket was like our own businesses. We hold them out there hoping someone will come by, visit us and drop money into it. And when they do, do we look them in the eye and say … thank you.

Be careful your attitude is showing.

I have a family member who works for a national “big box” store. She drags herself to work everyday, complaining constantly about what she does.

Her day starts by putting on whatever is on her bedroom floor. She makes no attempt to look good. What is the point she would tell you – “it’s just a job”. She complains during breakfast about how she doesn’t want to go there. If you were to visit her at her workplace, she never offers a smile or any degree of customer service.

I asked her one day if she understood that her attitude is always showing. Does she understand that every customer she serves in the day could be an employer of people, an employer of a “better job”? Does she understand that she will never get promoted with such a poor attitude?

The other day I saw her and she has changed! She looks great, outfit ironed, teeth brushed and a smile on her face.

Workplace Attitude

Workplace Attitude

I explain to her how wonderful it is she has decided to change her attitude. She explains to me that the only reason she is doing this is because the “big boss” is coming in today. She goes on to explain that her manager told all of the staff that they needed to look nice, have a smile on their face and be really really nice to customers all day.

I asked her, “Doesn’t your manager tell you that you have to look nice, smile and be nice to the customers EVERYDAY?” She responded with relief in her voice, “ No thank goodness, just today!”


Something good.

We were celebrating a special day at school. Our daughter Jayda and her friend were in a small group to win a speaking contest at school. So we decided to cash in our two for one coupons at our local Bath Goddess store. Jamie made the experience extra fun as we mixed our specially blended bath products.

Thanking Jamie for her great service the sign in their store caught my eye. It reads :

Everyday may not be good but there is something good in everyday.

Agreed Bath Goddess. That is definitely a 90% message to send people.

shower poster

No Worries

I like the quote that says, “Be kind to the people you meet for everyone is fighting some kind of battle.” Plato

I try to practice that. I like to show patience. I like to use the words “no worries” wherever I can. When I have to wait in line, my order is taking too long and someone bumps into me, I don’t own why they are late or rude.

I have faith that everyone has a story and some a battle go with it. I can choose to offer a bit of kindness.

Darci and SoulWheat

The SoulWheat trio sat together two short months ago …”oh if we can get a dozen of today’s Thought-Leaders to respond to our question for launch day that will be awesome” – and then there were 26!

We are grateful in a way that words inadequately describe. So if you will accept this small token: you were one of the original 26 who believed in us – we will carry you in our hearts (and SOULS of course!) forever.

So check out your beautiful photo and definition in the March 27th posting at http://www.SoulWheat.com

Happy Valentine’s Day

Darren and I decided years ago to postpone celebrating Valentines Day to the following week as our wedding anniversary is February 17th which I realize now was very smart of Darren — we can celebrate two in one.

Celebrating a week later helps us to avoid the rush at restaurants and the expensive flowers. Rather than buying a lot of gifts for each other we like to carve out time. We love to go for lunch and then grab a coffee and walk around our goregous Wascana Lake (http://www.wascana.sk.ca/) . We spend time rather than money. Of course I love to talk and we try to come to our walks with interesting things we have learned since our last walk or really cool questions to ask each other. We try not to spend the entire walk talking about work and our children. This year we have 10 GREAT questions thanks to our friends, William and Edrina Sinclair. Their website, http://aliveinlove.com/, is all about how to build stronger relationships. In one spot they have a sign up that says, “Looking For Some Love Questions To Spark Conversation With Your Life Partner? We’ll Send You *Ten Love Questions* over *Ten Days* To Help You Either *Start Or Continue a Conversation* With Your Partner!” What a great way to honour your partner. I wont give away any of their questions but they are wonderful. And really get you talking about important topics.

Relationships deserve our time. Carve some out for those you life. I know life is busy but it shouldn’t be too busy for a coffee and a walk.


I was totally honoured to speak at our province’s SUMA ( www.suma.org) Conference on Monday and was reminded of how nice Saskatchewan people are.

We are very blessed to live in this great province.

I am constantly amazed at the contrasts within our province. At the SUMA Conference, I met a lot of wonderful provincial dignitaries and profile leaders of their communities. Then an hour later, I was being interviewed for a Saskatchewan cable television show – Lit Happens hosted by Wes Funk ( http://www.wesfunk.ca/Lit.html).  What was neat was that one hour I was in a room of 1100 people and the next hour I was in a small studio with filled with artists.  The comparison reminded me that no matter what you do – you must do something you love.

The artists at pulsworks studio  (http://www.pulsworks.com/)  inspired me to always live my dream. Thanks to Sandy and his team for reminding me that there is a world of artists who are living theirs and doing some really amazing things in our province. One of the artists I met was Kevin Hastings and he is following his dream as a graphite artist. And what a talent he is.. check it out!  www.kevin-hastings.ca.

Just One Thing

This is an excerpt from Darci’s Focus on the 90% book.

I over heard two women talking in line at the grocery store and one woman asked the other if she had made any News Years Resolutions? She replied “Oh why bother, I have so many things I want to improve and I never stick to them anyway.”

Could I relate to that! I found in the past that I did not stick to my resolutions either. Just like the woman in line at the grocery store, I felt there were just too many things, too many “10%s” I wanted to improve. At the start of a year I would buy a lovely flowered journal and “lay out” what I wanted to resolve to do better in the upcoming year. I wanted to be healthier, build a stronger marriage with Darren, more quality time with Jayda and John, more time with family and friends, internal healing work, etc, etc…

So here is what I did a few years ago. I decided I would only work on one thing a year. I would spend the entire year working on just that one thing. People ask me, “Where do I start?” Sit by yourself for a few minutes and think about your biggest stress — your burning issue — your greatest “10%”. What is it? Your self-esteem? Health? Money? A relationship that needs mending? Something from your past? (you might be saying – all of the above!). I have often asked people when they stopped loving themselves and many can tell me exactly when. I would start there.

Pick just one 10% and “lay that sucker out”. With the full lives we lead, how can we possibly fit in ten improvements?

Spend this year working on that one thing. Don’t try and deal with the weight, the smoking, the ex, and the aging parents all in one year. That is why we do not stick to improving our 10%s, there are too many to think about. I respect that other “issues” of life are still around, but your main focus should be that one thing. Spend that year doing what you need to do to make it happen — gyms, books, websites, counseling, naturopaths, healers, etc.

I create pockets of time (i.e. turn the TV off!) and make the commitment. I post my resolution everywhere; it becomes my theme for that year. I tell everyone what I am working on so they can keep me accountable. Most importantly, I promise myself, at the end of the year, this one thing will have greatly improved. I will not talk about improving the same thing over and over. I will just do it. It will change your life to improve this way. I know it is hard. But what are we waiting for? The hardest person to change is the one that stares back at you in the mirror.

So now, the next time someone in a grocery store line asks  you if you have made any New Year’s Resolutions you can say. “Yes, I made ONE and I am really going to stick to it.”

Making the Christmas season more peaceful – Tip #5

#5. It needs to be more meaningful.

Darci at Christmas


Make it more meaningful. Traditions do that. Create more traditions. Here are some of ours. We celebrate LangMas on the first snow fall (order supper and a Christmas movie). The Christmas tree goes up on November 1st. We buy a new ornament each year that reflects our year. Celebrate your religious traditions. These will be what our children remember.

Growing up, my favourite tradition was the search for the perfect Charlie Brown Christmas tree with my dad. He and I would bring it home in his Volkswagen beetle with the top down and set it up in our tiny little house. Funny I don’t remember a single present I ever received but I sure remember these special times with my dad.

Making the Christmas season more peaceful – Tip #4

#4. Family dynamics come into play.
Don’t let them. Put your hand on the door knob of the house you are about to enter this season and choose to see the 90%s of the people on the other side. Before you enter breath deeply and choose love first. Change your family dynamics by changing you. Don’t drag the past to every family gathering.

I grew up and around five different families and all the excitement that comes with that. It was very interesting for me to watch how people would park their differences around the holidays. Husbands could pick up children from ex-wives and still come and have a drink with their children’s new family.

There is a new sitcom called “The Neighbours” about a regular family living amongst a neighbourhood of aliens who have taken human form. What I love is how they mock how humans behave. In one episode, the “human” mother-in-law visits her daughter-in-law and is very hard on her and makes the visit very difficult. The alien son asks her why she treats her daughter-in-law that way. When the woman explains that the generations of her family have always treated the daughter-in-law unfairly, it’s just what they do. The alien boy told her to go back in the house and be nice to her instead. The boy challenged her to “change the game”. Maybe its time for you to “change the game” with your families.