Stay Focused Videos

How are you showing up in the world today? I hear from so many clients who are dealing with people who struggle with dysregulation (complex emotional stress). Their staff are feeling it. The people they serve are feeling it. And sometimes they’re going home to people who are struggling too. We can’t control all of that. But we can pay attention to how we are showing up. Recently, I was at a self-checkout when the machine beside me stopped working for another customer. And yes, that is frustrating! I don’t know what was happening in this man’s life or what he was carrying with him that day. But he became incredibly upset. He started banging on the self-checkout, yelling and swearing as staff came over to help. And suddenly, everyone around him was affected. It reminded me that how we show up doesn’t only affect us. Our energy, reactions and behaviour can affect an entire room. Through the Darci Lang Focus on the 90% philosophy, I talk a lot about focusing on what we can control. I can’t control what is happening in the world around me, but I can pay attention to what I need so I can show up in that world differently. Am I rested? Am I nourished? Am I taking care of myself? Am I giving myself opportunities to slow down and come back to centre? My challenge for you this week is to check in with yourself before you reach that breaking point. What do you need to feel calmer, centred and ready to handle the 10% when it comes your way? Tell me in the comments: What helps you come back to centre when you’re feeling overwhelmed? For more from Darci Lang on focusing on the 90%, positive workplaces and choosing how we show up, subscribe to the channel and follow along on social media. Like this video if it gave you something to think about. Share what helps you come back to centre in the comments. Subscribe for more from Darci Lang. Follow Darci on social media and stay connected.

It’s Boss’s Day this week. Although, firstly, I think we should lose the term “boss” forever! But if you are a boss, leader or someone responsible for a team, I have a story for you. My husband Darren and I have been renovating our home for 30 years. We’ve done a lot of the work ourselves, including a huge yard renovation that created our dream retreat in the backyard. There were some things we couldn’t do ourselves, including a major cement project. It took weeks to complete, with different people coming in at different stages. Each person had a specialized role and worked on one piece of a much bigger project. When everything was finished, the owner of the cement company did something I’ve never forgotten. He brought his entire team back to see the finished project. When I asked him why, he explained that he wanted his people to see that even though they may have only worked on one part, they were part of the whole thing. I loved that. It’s something I think every leader can learn from. When we’re busy moving from one project to the next, it can be easy to forget to bring people back together and show them what their individual contributions helped create. As Darci Lang often shares through the Focus on the 90% philosophy, people want to feel valued, appreciated and recognized for what they bring to their workplace. So, in honour of Boss’s Day, I have a challenge for leaders: Celebrate what your people helped build. Show them the finished project. Share the results. Bring everyone together. Help each person see how their piece contributed to something bigger. And tell me in the comments: How do you celebrate your team when a project is finished? For more from Darci Lang on positive workplaces, leadership and focusing on the 90%, subscribe to the channel and follow along on social media. Like this video if it gave you an idea for your team. Share how you celebrate your people in the comments. Subscribe for more from Darci Lang. Follow Darci on social media and stay connected.

Happy October! How is your yearly theme going? My theme this year is love, and I have to tell you, it has become one of my favourite themes. One of the ways I’ve been bringing more of the 90%, what’s good and positive, into my life is through a centering practice. And this year, I added something new: a centering statement. Life gets busy. Things happen around us that we can’t control. Work can feel overwhelming. Our personal lives can feel overwhelming. There are even moments when I’m standing backstage before a speaking event and I feel overwhelmed. Darci Lang's centering statement brings her back to herself: “I love you, and you’ve got this.” It reminds me to come back to my peaceful, loving self and focus on what I can control. That simple statement has changed so much about how I move through this year. It’s another way I’m putting the Darci Lang Focus on the 90% philosophy into practice in my own life. I can’t control everything happening around me, but I can create something that helps bring me back to centre when I need it. My challenge for you: Create your own centering statement. What words could you say to yourself when life feels overwhelming that would bring you back to who you want to be? Then share it in the comments. What is your centering statement? You might even inspire someone else to find theirs. For more from Darci Lang on focusing on the 90%, choosing your perspective, and creating more good and positive in your life, subscribe to the channel and follow along on social media. Like this video if it gave you something to try. Share your centering statement in the comments. Subscribe for more from Darci Lang. Follow Darci on social media and stay connected.

Happy Thanksgiving week! There is so much to be thankful for, even when the world doesn't always feel like a place where it's easy to find the good. The other day, I witnessed an elderly woman get into an accident right beside me. She pulled into a parking lot and drove into the building. It was shocking. But then I watched what happened next. Nine of us got out of our cars and ran over to make sure she was okay. People offered to help. Someone called 911. Within minutes, emergency responders were there. In a scary moment, I watched kindness pour out from complete strangers. It reminded me of something I believe deeply: there is still so much good in the world. I know there is a lot of 10%. I know there are difficult things happening around us, and I'm not suggesting we ignore them. But through Darci Lang's Focus on the 90% philosophy, I've learned to intentionally look for the kindness, compassion, and goodness happening too. Because when I look for it, I see it all the time. This Thanksgiving, my challenge for you is simple: Look for the good. Notice the person who holds the door. The stranger who stops to help. The friend who checks in. The small acts of kindness that might otherwise pass unnoticed. Then tell me in the comments: What good have you noticed lately? For more from Darci Lang on focusing on the 90%, choosing your perspective and looking for what's good and positive in everyday life, subscribe to the channel and follow along on social media. Like this video if it gave you something to think about. Share some good you've noticed in the comments. Subscribe for more from Darci Lang. Follow Darci on social media and stay connected. Happy Thanksgiving!

Do you need to know everything that’s going wrong at home when you’re hundreds or even thousands of miles away? My husband Darren and I have a rule. We’ve been parents for 25 years. We’re both motivational speakers. We travel. We have a family, beloved pets and all the regular 10% that comes with life. When one of us is on the road, our answer to “How is everything?” is usually pretty simple: Everything is great. Unless there is something the other person truly needs to know, we don’t unload the 10% happening at home while they’re away. Why? Because if Darren is a thousand miles away and there is absolutely nothing he can do about a situation at home, what does telling him in that moment accomplish? Now he’s carrying the worry too. Over my 33 years of travelling as a motivational speaker, I’ve seen how easily upsetting news from home can change someone’s entire experience when they’re away. They can’t fix it. They can’t help. But they can certainly worry about it. So Darren and I wait. When one of us is getting close to coming home, that’s when we have the conversation: Okay, now tell me what’s really been going on. It’s one of the ways we protect each other’s ability to be fully present wherever we are. And it connects to something I talk about often through the Darci Lang Focus on the 90% philosophy: not every piece of the 10% needs your attention at every moment. My challenge for you: Before sharing something stressful with someone who is away, ask yourself: Do they need to know this right now? Can they do anything about it? Or can it wait? What do you think? Would this rule work in your family? Tell me in the comments. For more from Darci Lang on focusing on the 90%, being fully present and choosing where you put your energy, subscribe to the channel and follow along on social media.

What do you do on the days when you just don’t want to go to work? I was recently on a Zoom call with a client who asked me that exact question. Some members of her team have been struggling with motivation or calling in sick, and she wanted to know what I do on one of those days myself. Because I have them too. When I start focusing on the 10%, thinking about how I don’t want to travel or everything I have ahead of me, I can actually feel my body change. My shoulders slump. My energy drops. Even my face changes. So I interrupt it. I sit up straight, put my shoulders back and start asking myself: What’s going to be good? What do I love about travelling? What do I love about speaking? I get to meet amazing people. I get to eat a lunch I didn’t make. I get to drink tea I didn’t make. I get to stay in a hotel bed I didn’t make. And there are no dishes or laundry waiting for me! I rapid-fire the good until my brain starts seeing the 90% again. It doesn’t change the fact that I have to go to work. It changes what I’m focusing on when I get there. That’s something I’ve learned through the Darci Lang Focus on the 90% philosophy: sometimes you have to intentionally redirect your brain toward what is good, especially on the days when it doesn’t happen naturally. My challenge for you: The next time you don’t feel like going to work, pause before you let the 10% take over. Sit up, put your shoulders back and start listing what’s good. Then tell me in the comments: What helps you stay motivated on days when you just don’t feel like it? For more from Darci Lang on focusing on the 90%, creating a more positive workplace and changing where you put your energy, subscribe to the channel and follow along on social media.

When you plan a training day for your team, who are you planning it for? This week, I’m preparing to speak to three completely different audiences. And after years of speaking, I’ve noticed something that happens in almost every room. About 90% of the people show up grateful to be there. They appreciate the opportunity, the meal, the snacks, the swag and, most importantly, the investment being made in them. They feel valued, respected and cared for. Then there’s the 10% who simply don’t want to be there. And too often, that 10% gets most of our attention. We change the training. We worry about whether they’re happy. We try to win them over. We put so much energy into changing the experience for a small group of people that we risk overlooking the 90% who showed up ready to learn. After more than 30 years of speaking, Darci Lang has learned to look at it differently. What if we designed our training, recognition and workplace experiences around the people who do want to be there? Celebrate them. Invest in them. Give them a great experience. Make sure they know how much their attitude and contribution matter. Because sometimes, instead of trying to change the 10%, we need to put our energy into the 90% who deserve it. My challenge for leaders this week: The next time you’re planning something for your team, ask yourself: Am I building this for the 90% who are engaged, or am I letting the 10% drive my decisions? Tell me what you think in the comments. How much energy should leaders spend trying to win over the 10%? For more from Darci on creating positive workplaces, choosing where you focus your energy and living the Focus on the 90% philosophy, subscribe to the channel and follow along on social media.

As September brings us back to work, school, meetings and busy schedules, here’s a question worth asking: Who is showing up? This summer, I dusted off a book I first bought 30 years ago, Your Sacred Self by @WayneDyerMotivation1. I’ve read it many times, but this time I was reminded of something so simple and so important. We have a choice in how we show up. Do we lead with love, kindness and our spiritual side? Or do we let our ego run the show? It made me think about the 10% part of my Focus on the 90% philosophy. That 10% can be loud. It can take over our thoughts, our reactions and how we interact with the people around us. But we have a choice about whether we let it. So as you head into a busy September, take a moment each day and ask yourself: Who is sitting at my desk today? Who is walking into this meeting? Who is showing up on this Zoom call? Am I showing up centred, kind and grounded? Or is my ego running the show? My challenge for you: Pay attention to that choice this week. When you catch your ego taking over, see if you can move that 10% aside and choose how you really want to show up. Then tell me in the comments: What helps you get back to your 90%? For more from Darci Lang on focusing on the 90%, choosing your perspective and bringing more positivity into everyday life, subscribe to the channel and follow along on social media.

Parents are not born with a script. Happy Father’s Day. In this heartfelt reflection, Darci Lang celebrates the fathers in her life, including her Dad and her husband, Darren, while sharing a parenting lesson that has stayed with her for years. Her son loved to skateboard, and they watched skateboarding videos when he was younger. While watching an interview with professional skateboarder Chris Cole and his children on his lap, she heard him say something simple but powerful: "I wasn't given a script on how to be a good father." That idea resonated deeply. None of us are handed a manual on how to be great parents. We often parent from the examples, experiences, and belief systems we grew up with. Some of those lessons serve us well. Others may need to be rewritten. Darci invites parents to reflect on their own parenting journey. Are there parts of your script that no longer fit? Is there a different way you want to show up for your children? The good news is that it is never too late to learn, grow, and create a new story. Parenting is not about perfection. It is about being willing to keep learning and loving along the way. Learn more at www.darcilang.com 👉 Subscribe for more reflections on parenting, leadership, and living from your 90%.